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Heh. So my friend Simon phoned this morning (yay phones! people talk to you! who knew?) and came round ten minutes later, and away we went with bags'n'buckets, to commit scrumping. He had seen, he thought, a tree loaded down with yellow plums, that nobody was picking...

When we eventually refound it, it turned out to be apples of a curious shape, but perfectly nice; and in the hunt we had discovered a dead industrial estate full of pears and apples and rowanberries, so yup. My dining-room floor is currently covered with scrumped fruit and interested cats (no, not going to eat any, but it all smells nice, apparently). And I shall make apple chutney and pear chutney and rowanberry jelly, and people better watch out for I shall come bearing gifts, and we all know what that leads to...

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