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desperanceThey have gone away to fetch woods. Two-by-four, they said, which I always understood to be a metaphor but I think they mean it otherwise.
It is curious, how much I struggle with all this. A part of me wants to be interested, learning more about how my house is put together, and how it can be fixed - but mostly I want just to walk away and go home. Except that this is home, and there's nowhere else to go. And I do kind of have to be here anyway. All shall be well, and better than it has been - but the process is eating at me, like rot in a hurry. Like rodents. Something. All my own structures are showing, and they're less secure than my bathroom floor.
It is curious, how much I struggle with all this. A part of me wants to be interested, learning more about how my house is put together, and how it can be fixed - but mostly I want just to walk away and go home. Except that this is home, and there's nowhere else to go. And I do kind of have to be here anyway. All shall be well, and better than it has been - but the process is eating at me, like rot in a hurry. Like rodents. Something. All my own structures are showing, and they're less secure than my bathroom floor.