Oh, lawks, I'm sorry. I am soooo sorry... (Mind, I do recognise the moment; I've been stared at by toes before now. It's just one of those facts that is inadmissible in the court of fiction; the defence "but that's what happened" is no defence at all...)
Doesn't matter. All can be fixed. Get to the end, then sleep.
There is no end, and no sleep this side Jordan. Nothing ever ends, you only lose the thread of it. I've written another five thousand words since I saw you, and all I've done is think of another scene that has to go in, and give away the compensation before I deliver the kicker blow, so now I need something else to take the taste away, and. And and and.
Well, 'his eyes staring' does still make sense. You're just specifying what his eyes are doing: staring as opposed to drooping, squinting, closing, tearing, itching...
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(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-11 05:07 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-11 05:20 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-19 09:56 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-11 07:32 pm (UTC)You can do this, you know. In fact, you do it rather well...
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-11 10:39 pm (UTC)There is no end, and no sleep this side Jordan. Nothing ever ends, you only lose the thread of it. I've written another five thousand words since I saw you, and all I've done is think of another scene that has to go in, and give away the compensation before I deliver the kicker blow, so now I need something else to take the taste away, and. And and and.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-12 12:54 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-12 08:58 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-12 11:59 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-12 06:38 am (UTC)*Hugs* as my kids would write. (Though being under 5' tall I'd have to climb a stepladder...)