Bagpipe music, redux

[desperance]

If I had batteries in my camera, I could take a picture, just to prove him. As I don't, you'll have to settle for a description. He's in his thirties, give or take. He's wearing a white T-shirt and tracksuit bottoms, trainers. And he's walking up and down the nearest path in the park over the road, parallel to my windows. There are literally square miles of moorland behind him, where he could move pretty much out of human earshot, but no.

He's not a bad performer on the pipes, and he has a decent range of tunes - but he has no stamina. He plays for thirty seconds, forty-five max; then he pauses, then he plays something else. This constant on-offedness makes it impossible to tune him out. Which makes it impossible to work.

If I had a sniper's rifle - well, if I had a sniper's rifle I would be in prison by now, for more significant murders than his. But. I wish he would stop, or go away. And what I really resent about this is that I am fond of bagpipe music, as a rule: definitely not one of those people who finds it antisocial by nature. Just, he has caught me in a really sour mood, and I would like to lose myself in my work, and he's preventing me.

Also, right now, he is playing the Skye Boat Song. Which is an offence against nature. I can haz that sniper's rifle nao?

Comments

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

The week markgritter and I got engaged was haunted by his parents' next-door neighbor playing the bagpipes very badly. It took me a full five minutes to realize that he was attempting to play the US Marine Corps Hymn. For reference, my grandfather is a retired Marine, and the Marine Corps Hymn was the first tune I learned to pick out on the piano when I was 3 or 4. So: pretty familiar. Except for the way this guy played it. Uff da.

Also, do you know the Bruce Cockburn song, "If I Had a Rocket Launcher"? It sounds like you and Mr. Cockburn have a similar approach to this sort of situation.

[autopope.livejournal.com]

Bagpipes ...

I live in Edinburgh. Two factoids:

1. A couple of years back, a bagpipe teacher was driven out of his home by the neighbours. All of them. And nobody said nuthink'.

2. If you visit Edinburgh and wander around the centre, the one bagpiper not to be rude to is the skinny east asian guy in jeans and trainers (as opposed to the numerous pipers in full highland drag). Clue: the Castle is an active army base, and it sometimes has Gurkhas ...

[desperance.livejournal.com]

Hee. Noted...

[martyn44.livejournal.com]

Is that Scottish pipes? Northumbrian pipes? (God or definitely someone save us!) Irish pipes?

Open your window and play him some Dhimmu Borghir or Akercocke VERY loudly. Failing that, don't open you window and play yourself . . .

It'll feel so good when it stops.

[nojay.livejournal.com]

Why he keeps stopping: he may be tuning his pipes, or breaking in a new set of drones or reeds. He has to do it somewhere.

Skye Boat Song: thank the Lord he isn't doing "Amazing Grace".

[desperance.livejournal.com]

You are clearly psychic. Not in a good way. "Amazing Grace" was his next offering, immediately - yes, immediately! - after the Skye Boat Song. I nearly ETA'd to log it. That was what drove me screaming from the computer, to where I could slam some music on and drown him.

[rysmiel.livejournal.com]

I'll see your "Amazing Grace" and raise you Miss Gina the Dragpiper's medley of "Do Ya Think I'm Sexy" and the Ode to Joy, backed by Brazilian steel drums.

[desperance.livejournal.com]

No. No! Noooo...!

[rysmiel.livejournal.com]

Montreal: It may not take all kinds, but we certainly have all kinds anyway.

[fidelioscabinet.livejournal.com]

It sounds like a good thing you don't have a chainsaw, then.

[shewhomust.livejournal.com]

The Folk Music degree has a lot to answer for...

[desperance.livejournal.com]

There are degrees in this stuff? (That smart-ass muttering "degrees of suffering" in the background is, of course, not me.)

[mevennen.livejournal.com]

Christ, it's not Craig, is it? Usually he plays outside St John's church.

Craig and I always have the following conversation:

Craig: Y'llright?
Me: Yes. Are you all right?
Craig: Aye!

All we ever say to each other.

[xnamkrad.livejournal.com]

Someone told me there is a new rule that bagpipe players must wear earplugs while practicing to protect their eardrums

[mantichore.livejournal.com]

Well, is he at least wearing a kilt? And has he the legs for it?

[desperance.livejournal.com]

Nope. And, at a guess, no. You are still unrivalled.

[mantichore.livejournal.com]

You base flatterer, you.